Blah Blah Blah

Yes that is how I feel today!  Yesterday I went to my Aunts funeral she was 91.  It was at the church I grew up in very nostalgic day.  I sat behind my sister who had a doctors appointment to find out if the cancer she had was back.  As a sat beside my 86 year old mother and looked around at all my cousins that I never get to see and thought about how I was baptized in this church had my first real kiss in this church well on church grounds anyway, I was singing hymns and just felt so cozy, tears stinging my eyes and I mean really must have been the mascara.  I just was taken back way back to my childhood, thoughts of regrets over this and that wanted to creep in but I said NO and pushed them right out.  I just savored that little moment of joy of being with my family singing the praises of God.  My cousin Jimmy was there he is my favorite cousin the sweetest guy I know.  Well anyway finally after all that my sister got her results and I don't know why I was allowing myself to be so negative but she is cancer free.  I am so happy I just kept thinking how sad and awful it would be to have to see her go through all of that again.  So that leads me to today's title blah blah blah that is how I feel after filling out two job aps on line which I Hate doing I feel like the energy has been sucked out of me.  So here I am blogging just to empty the junk in my head and now I am going to finish the book I started and just let myself rest.  I think stuff like that takes you on an emotionalacoster and you have to let yourself just rest for a day kinda pamper yourself!  So that is what I am going to do.  Praying for a peppy tomorrow!